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Daycycle 105 [ August 28 - September 03]

daycycle 105

[Aug 28 - Sept 3]

Early Morning [0800 - 0900] — All Troubleshooters Report for Duty
Felicity Smoak and Natasha Romanoff, have been selected for today’s mission. Details are below:

‘In order to help us improve our combat simulators, you will need to run through any combat situation you encounter at least three times. On the second pass through, engage the combat at a greater range than originally. On the third pass through, attempt it at a much closer range. You will provide tactical notes to our staff afterwards. If the simulators catch fire, or fail to respond to override commands... note that too. The eggheads were supposed to have fixed that.’

Please debrief the computer on the status of your mission by the end of the Daycycle here.

Morning & Afternoon [0900 - 1600] — Service Firm Positions
All Troubleshooters not assigned a mission should report to their Service Firm for their daily duties, unless specifically assigned a different shift.

Evening [1600 - 2200] — Citizen Improvement
All Alpha citizens are encouraged to better themselves through Alpha’s wide variety of educational, entertainment and cultural opportunities offered each evening. Attending these sanctioned events are not mandatory, but is highly encouraged by The Computer. Citizens choosing not to take advantage of these opportunities, have a growing number of other options available to them in how to spend their hard earned credits and free time.

Tonight’s event will be at 1700 in Hangar 15, Armed Forces Sector and will be hosted by the Alpha Complex Dogeball Association. Join us for a game of Alpha Dodgeball! All clearance levels above INFRARED welcome.

Alpha Curfew Restrictions
All Alpha citizens should be in their quarters within the Wagon Wheel by 2200, unless they’ve been given permission from a GREEN or higher clearance level citizen. Sleeping Aid gas is dispelled each night in the Wagon Wheel at 2200 to assist citizens in getting a productive sleeping period.

Confession Booths
There are hundreds of confession booths available around Alpha Complex if a citizen would like to communicate directly with the computer. Please use these confession booths to report mission statuses, report treason or terrorist acts, unregistered mutants, confess your trespasses against Alpha Complex, request propaganda or speak with Your Friend, The Computer, at any time.

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On the other hand, Adam is perfectly okay doing without. He's never had much anyway. It's just another way that he doesn't understand why Ronan feels the need to do this here and now. He doesn't necessarily feel in a position to tell his boyfriend flat-out 'no' either. He imagines that telling Ronan no is like telling a tree not to grow. It's the equivalent of needlessly beating your head against a wall. Adam tries not to so that any more than he has to.

As he'd watched Ronan fight from the back wall, he's very still and his entire body is tense. He wants to rail against the guy beating up on Ronan. But Adam's there every night with their first aide kit. He doesn't trust the first aide kits that aren't theirs. Drugs seem to be a common use around here. You just never know.

Even though Ronan is tired, bruised and cut up, Adam has a hard time feeling sympathetic toward that. All he is is angry that Ronan is letting it happen. Ronan chose this. It is what it is.

Seeing Ronan walking out of the ring in that shape, it makes his stomach twist in uncomfortable knots. He hates it. He hates the chosen bruises and cracked ribs and swollen eyes. It makes his own skin feel too tight, like he's too seen here, like he should hide. All of those feelings have nothing to do with Ronan and everything to do with Adam. For this reason, when Ronan finally looks at him, Adam can't help that his eyes glance away in the way they used to do all the time.

"Sit." He gestures to the folding chair he's pilfered.

Ronan doesn't bother to argue with Adam. He feels like shit and he's grateful that Adam isn't trying to administer any drugs despite how crappy he feels. He notices the way that Adam's eyes glance off him in that way that they used to. It bothers him far more than any of the injuries he's incurred in the ring the past few nights.

"Look at me, Parrish. This isn't the worst I've been beat up. Hell, this isn't the worst you've been beat up."

Might as well put that out there.

"I'll be fine after a couple of days."

If he weren't so upset over this whole ordeal, he might have actually flinched at the comment about his own history with being beat up. As it is, there's just a slight twinge beneath the surface that no one can see and only he can feel.

Adam has to look at Ronan to tend to the cuts on his face. He never really looks into his eyes though. His hands, elegant even in their dirtiness, mechanically tend the wounds with well-practiced precision.

"Do you have to keep doing this?" He asks.

He's trying to show Adam how okay he is, trying to comfort him.

"Parrish...come on, look at me," Ronan says in a quiet voice that's more distressed than usual.

"if we want gas masks so we don't have to go to bed when they tell us to, I do."

They can get so much more done at night when everyone else is asleep.

Adam briefly looks into Ronan's eyes, his hands stilling over a particularly nasty cut on Ronan's brow. It's only brief though and then he's back to looking at the wounds and tending them as he shakes his head.

"Don't use me as an excuse. That isn't fair." He says, knowing full well how much Ronan enjoys this. Gas masks would be nice, but they aren't necessary. And Adam doesn't ever want to be a reason for this kind of violence, for Ronan getting beat up, for his boyfriend getting hurt.

Ronan makes a noise that's part growl and part sigh. "Dammit, Adam. I'm not using you as an excuse. I want some damn freedom here. I want it for me and for you. This is one way to do and I like punching the shit out of people. It feels good, especially these assholes that don't like us."

Adam just shakes his head and presses his lips together to keep from arguing. He wants to say so many things but he knows there's no point. This is Ronan. That's the bottom line. Adam has to get over it and accept it or what the hell is he doing?

Also, Adam always eventually backs down. While he's getting better at voicing his opinions and arguing his case, he's still Adam Parrish and the bottom line is that he's still no good at confrontation.

Instead, he cleans up what wounds of Ronan's he can and then packs up the first aid kit. "Fine. Fine." He finally says, sounding horribly like his mom.

To cover that up he forces a smirk. "You did kick some ass."

There are some things that won't ever change about Ronan,that he likes to fight is one of them. He's stubborn, that's not going to change either, and in some ways, this feels like sticking it to the man. At the very least, it's beating the man and he likes that.

Ronan doesn't want to bully Adam, but there are some things that are unavoidable and, in some cases, that's always going to be one of them. Adam isn't good at confrontation and Ronan craves it like air, though he doesn't like confrontation with Adam and he feels like a giant asshole right now.

Ronan grins at that. "Come on. Let's go back to the room. I'll shower and make it up to you."

"Or you can just shower." Because if this is in Ronan's nature, which it is, there shouldn't be anything to make up to him. Right? It isn't fair for Adam to expect or hope for any different. And maybe, just maybe, the penchant for violence and those sharp edges, in a strange and twisted way, is a part of what draws Adam to Ronan. Violence is what he's always known, after all. Same thing, different rules and fine print.

Adam shrugs and turns away, first aide kit in one hand while the other hand reaches back for Ronan's hand. His finger automatically hooks in the bracelet Adam always wears. They can head back to their room and Ronan can get clean. Adam can try to pretend like all of this is okay. Basically, it'll be like any day ending in 'Y' here.

Ronan narrows his eyes at Adam, trying to decide if Adam means 'just shower and leave me alone' or 'there's nothing to make up'. He knows that Adam accepts him the way he is; it's one of the things that had made Ronan fall in love with Adam. Everyone, including Gansey, wants Ronan to be a different person, or at least a 'better' version of himself. Adam has always liked Ronan for exactly who he was, even when that wasn't a pretty person. If it makes Adam strange and twisted, then Ronan is strange and twisted in the same way. He likes that Adam knows violence and isn't scared off by it, that he doesn't flinch when Ronan's kisses get a little violent, a little more teeth than most people probably like. He's learning to be gentle from Adam, but it hasn't taken that part of him away, just tempered it and added to it.

When Adam hooks his fingers in the bracelet that Ronan wears, he knows that Adam may not like this, but he's okay with it. "Maybe I want to kiss you anyway," he tells him.

"Your lip's busted... in more than one place." It's a valid argument, of course. And it isn't that Adam doesn't want to kiss Ronan. Kissing Ronan is always one of his favorite things. Even through his upset over the whole fighting ordeal, it's still one of his favorite things in spite of the way he might seem to fight it. It's just that kissing Ronan right now would just add to whatever hurt Ronan is already feeling. There's no sense in denying it either. Ronan is a mass of bruises and cuts. Of course he hurts.

They get to their room, a room they now share with two other men, unfortunately. Men, whom Adam doesn't trust or like as far as he can spit, which isn't very far. Not that he's given them much of a chance for liking or trusting, but, you know, he's Adam Parrish. He goes into the bathroom with Ronan because that's where they keep the first aide kit.

Ronan shrugs a little at Adam's argument. "So you'll be careful." Clearly, he's not going to let a little pain get in his way, particularly when there's a part of Ronan that likes pain. Yes, Ronan hurts and doing anything at all is going to make that pain flare. He's not going to deny it. There are some things that are worth all the pain.

Once in the bathroom, Ronan doesn't bother with modesty. He turns on the water as hot as it will go and strips off, stepping into the shower, eyes closing at the way the heat feels blissful on his skin, head bowed so the water can hit him and run down his body to wash all the blood off.

Of course Ronan won't bother with modesty. And of course he likes pain. Adam has caught on to that. It's obvious in the way he more and more often bites at Ronan's lips or squeezes his flesh just a little too hard. It always gets a reaction out of him. Ronan gets reactions from Adam often enough. Sometimes it's nice to return the favor.

With the first aide kit put away, Adam's gaze can't help but drift to the shower. He watches Ronan, unafraid while the other has his eyes closed. And somehow he's drifted closer, his fingertips pressed slightly to the glass doors as they start to fog up. Ronan's body is littered with bruises in the same way Adam's used to be. His stomach his flip-flopping uncomfortably. His mind and heart are torn between enjoying the intimate moment, just looking and cringing at what he's looking at.

Adam makes a mental list of all the names of the people Ronan has fought. He's going to find a way to retaliate, a smart way, a secret way.

Adam would think there was something wrong if Ronan bothered with modesty in front of him. It hasn't escaped his notice, the change in the way Adam touches him. Though, Ronan also likes it when Adam is gentle with him. It's a different sort of touch, a different sort of reaction. Most people aren't gentle with Ronan because he doesn't appear to need it. He likes it when Adam is sometimes.

It's several moments before Ronan opens his eyes. When he does, Adam is there with his fingertips pressed to the glass doors. Ronan doesn't flinch, simply looks at Adam a moment before sliding the door open, an invitation to let him in if that's what he wants, even if he'd like to come in the shower fully clothed.

Really, he doesn't need to do that. Ronan is absolutely okay with this.

Really, Adam knows he should stay out here. And it's his full intention to do so, except when he looks up from cataloging all the bruises and cuts on Ronan's body to see Ronan's eyes open and looking at him. Then the door slides open and Adam heel-toes his shoes off and is already stepping into the shower without even giving it a second thought. His socks are immediately soaked and he reahes down under the cuffs of his jeans to peel those off too.

Then, just as gently as his fingers had been pressed to the glass, he starts finding and touching every wound, replaying each fight in his mind as if he can make out which of Ronan's opponents left which one. And maybe he can. Adam's memory is sharp and long. He's looked like this a lot, Adam has, although he never asked for it like Ronan had. He has flashes of his own reflection as well, every time he'd looked in a mirror after his dad had kicked his ass and had to make a decision over whether or not he could go to school that day or not.

His fingertips circle around bruises, glide over cuts and he commits them all to memory.

Ronan doesn't think that Adam should stay out. He's absolutely okay with Adam coming into the shower. He wouldn't have opened the shower door if he wasn't. When Adam steps into the shower, Ronan steps back a little, giving him a little more room.

His eyes close as Adam starts touching the injuries, bruises and cuts. His eyes close and he takes a sharp breath that makes him wince a little. He groans a little and sways toward Adam. After a moment, he reaches out, fingers sliding up under Adam's shirt and pushing it up a little.

Adam knows that slight ghostly sting that comes with touching injuries like these, a slight discomfort, a reminder of your own weakness for letting it happen. Only Ronan isn't weak. He's probably the strongest person Adam has ever known. These injuries are both everything and nothing like the kinds of injuries Adam has known.

"I hate this. I wanna get home." He confesses in a whisper. He's tried to be strong like Ronan, strong for Ronan, but he isn't feeling so strong right now. "How do we get back home?" He knows the answer. There is no obvious way back home. Still... he just needs a moment to accept that... again.

It's not that Adam is weak, but the sting means different things to them. To Ronan, these injuries give him power. For Adam, his injuries were something that took power away from him. He doesn't mind the sting, doesn't mind that Adam is touching them because it is Adam.

Ronan swallows hard because there's nothing he can do to give Adam what he wants. There's nothing he can do to get any of them home. Rather than answer, Ronan wraps his arms tight around Adam and holds him.

Ronan holds onto him and Adam curls in against him for a moment before his arms uncurl from between them and he hugs Ronan back. He really does hate this, everything about it. He doesn't like not being in control after he fought so hard to gain that control. That's, in part, what Aglionby was about, getting away from his parents, away from people who stole his money and used and abused him, away from needing anyone or anything but himself.

Then Ronan happened. Maybe he got out of Aglionby, but he could never, not even if he wanted to, get away from Ronan.

Eventually, Adam makes himself push back and shakes his head. He bows his head, his eyes pressing to his eyes because he almost cried just now and he hates himself for that. "I'm sorry."

This place sucks a lot because it does take away your control. It takes away your freedom. Both Ronan and Adam are trying to get little shreds of those back and they're doing it in different ways. Ronan hates this even more because it's so hard on Adam. He hates that the confidence and peace Adam gained back home is being chipped away here.

He'd apologize for that, but he's not sorry for it.

He doesn't have to be sorry for almost crying. Ronan wouldn't have said a word to him about it. He would have held him until he was done then held him for a little while longer. Ronan shakes his head. "No. Don't fucking do that. You don't have to say you're sorry. Not to me, not to anyone."

When Adam's blue eyes look back up to Ronan, they're sharp and steady for a brief moment before that edge seems to seep out of him again. He keeps telling himself he'll find a way to get back at the people who hurt Ronan, but can he really do that? It feels like he has no power here. It feels like he's gone backward, not forward. And maybe that's the worst thing about this place. He keeps trying to dig back out of it and he can't.

"You're gonna keep doing this? The fights?" He asks, trying to save face, at least a little bit. "For how long?"

Ronan hesitates at that question because he can see how hard this is for Adam and he hates doing that to him. At the same time, he thinks this is probably more of a straw that broke the camel's back sort of deal. He's coping better with this place because Ronan has known who he is for a long time. Adam had just found that confidence and now it's swept out from underneath him.

"I don't know," he finally answers. "I guess 'til I lose long as they keep paying me."

No, this is not easy for Adam at all. He's going to have to distance himself from it to make it kind of tolerable. He'll still show up to Ronan's fights. He'll be gone when they're over though. He won't hang around to linger in the aftermath of them nor will he get there early to witness the prequel of them. There to make sure Ronan stays alive and then gone again.

"Right. Okay." He nods, not giving any argument either way, just blind acceptance that this is happening. He pushes the shower door open to step out. He sheds his wet jumpsuit and towels himself off before seeking out another dry jumpsuit. "When you get out you should put more stuff on those cuts." He adds on his way out.

Ronan hates this. He hates it and he understands it and he hates that he understands it. Money is safety, even in this place he knows that money has to equal safety. He'd seen it back home with Gansey and his money. He's trying to build something to protect Adam, to protect himself, trying to make this place a little more bearable for the both of them and instead, he's making it harder for Adam. That much is obvious.

When Adam steps out, Ronan watches him from under the showerhead, but when he finally leaves the bathroom with that bit of advice, he closes his eyes and turns the water up a little more, adds a little more heat to it. It'll be a long while before he comes out, pale skin red from the water and uncharacteristically quiet.

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Daycycle 105 [ August 28 - September 03]

daycycle 105

[Aug 28 - Sept 3]

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I think this one is a wrap